I ain't going to lie, turning 30 is a real beatch. Granted the Bushido has a few months under his belt since the 30th-birthday, but I still get all of the thirty questions: When are you getting married? What is the next step in your career? And is that a bald spot? My one response to the first two questions is be patient baby, I am a work in progress. My response to the last question is a big Florida University-FU! I am not going bald-it is my crown part (see photo). In my defense I noticed Harrison Ford has the same crown part when I saw the back of his head in the movie "Working Girl" (a brilliant flick, check it out if you don't own it already-I picked it up at Target for $5.99). Obviously, I don't get to see the back of my head as much as I would like-wait, why would I want to see the back of my head? Oh that's right, the bald spot question. Well for the purpose of full disclosure and to end the bald debate, the proof is in the pudding, err, the picture. (Photo of last minute preps of JET & Bobo before Mark's wedding in the Citadel Chapel.)
It surprised me yesterday to learn that MTV was not only turning 25, but they weren't celebrating. No flash-backs, no Kennedy or Kurt Loder kicking it-well, Kurt is still at the network, but he isn't spoon feeding me the "You heard it here first" news. Not even a full day of videos-which if I recall was the reason for the channel in the first place. (For the record, I did learn by watching MTV News that Jay-Z is boycotting Krystal champagne because their suits made negative comments about Rap & Hip-Hop artists and their adoration of the bubblies. Who needs that snooty Frog water anyway?)
Oh...Buggles
As anyone who's ever played trivia will tell you, the Buggles "Video Killed the Radio Star" was the first video played on MTV, 25-years ago. Not that I saw the video for the first play because 1) I was 5 and wouldn't remember anyways and 2) My family didn't live in New Jersey nor did we have cable at the time. (Full disclosure: the first video I ever saw on MTV was the Fabulous Thunderbirds "Ain't that Tough Enough" followed by the astronaut planting the MTV flag on the Moon). I digress; I can understand why MTV wants to hide their 1/4 of century age to stay hip and cool. Nothing blows worse than realizing you are the old guy in the club. That being said, I did want to check out MTV after watching my normal Tuesday night programming. (Btw, for you trivia buffs, in tonight's episode of "Boston Legal" the pharmacutical company Delvin-McGregor which Michael J. Fox misused to receive treatment, was also the name of the dubious pharm company in the movie "The Fugitive"-BYAHHH!! Two Harrison Ford references in one post!!!)
New Pollution
It came to my attention why I didn't watch MTV anymore after watching "Final Fu" (a Martial Arts contest show) and "Making of the Band" (P-Diddy makes 5 attractive ladies music stars, work their beat Scott Storch)-MTV doesn't play videos anymore. All right, that is not entirely true, they show videos in the morning in the show "ADD-Videos" (basically a show were they play approx. 20-30 seconds of a video before switching to a new video with a minor connection). As if ADHD kids need help paying attention to anything for more than 30 seconds.
Reality TV killed the Video stars
What happened? Why won't MTV show videos anymore? Nelly Furtado's "Promiscious Girl" w/ Timbaland keeps my attention for the entire song. Why not play it over and over? What about the self-proclaimed "blonde ambition" of this Era Miss Paris Hilton? She has a fantastic (well mixed cocktail 1/2 part Blondie "The Tide is High" and 1/4 Gwen Stefani's earlier No Doubt Ska-band work and 1/4 Paris Hilton trying to whisper a singing voice) mixed studio song aptly named "Stars are Blind"...the lyrics are great, "Men are all crazy, and the Stars are blind". The video is a female version of Chris Isaacs' "I want to fall in love", but it works. And here I thought her talents stopped at making "blonde" comments and bad sex tapes. Boy was I ever partially wrong/right. The new pollution is that MTV no longer plays total crap videos which produce the bi-product of showcasing artists creative talents behind the camera, but they pollute the air with crap programs that have little or nothing to do with music. Why would a station with the intentions of being on the edge of music put Fezz from "That 70's Show" on for a half-hour with a show of nothing but snaps and Momma jokes? What does "Laguna Beach", "The Real World" or "Final Fu" have to with music? Nada a damn thing.
You heard it here first...
Perhaps this is MTV's way of saying, we are a work in progress. Our best intentions went off track and we are keeping things fresh. If you like videos, by all means get up early or stay up late and watch VH1. Just don't expect us to paint ourselves in the corner with music. Because when you look into the reflection of the MTV astronaut's helmet you won't see a bald spot.
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