Wingman

The WaPo’s Laura Sessions Stepp has done it again; the investigative reporter has uncovered top-secret information and exposed the stratagem of single men through out the world in her article, “A Bud for The Ladies”. That’s right Goose, Sessions Stepp put out our wingman secrets in print. She’s explained duties of the Wingman as “falling on the grenade”, recon and never hitting on the target your friend is hitting on. I was impressed that the article did also expose the female mirror of the wingman. I am talking about the ‘cock-blocking’ lady-friend who shoots you down at the end of the night and does everything in her power to prevent her friend (the mark) from making a “bad decision”. That is why you need a wingman-to run interference.

Don’t worry though guys, not all is lost. The article only gave away information used by George Washington students and not dashing, cavalier, So-Gents who invented and carried on the tradition of p-drops and fainting spells on distressed damsels and So-belles. That’s right; the article did not even mention the key role of the ‘Iceman’. If there is one thing that Jim Trabert will one day be eulogized is for is my icebreaking ability or my ability to break through the line of defense and get our group in the mix. That being said, hands down the best wingman I ever had was Craig Blackmon. I would have to say, Pit-Stop (Chad McGowan) and the Beav (Robert Going) would be closed seconds. Scott Farley is in way too good of shape which always forced me into the wingman slot. Tom Stikeleather was the man back in his day, but you had to keep an eye on him because when the going got tough, he’d duel you for the girl.